Monday, July 19, 2004

What do I want for my future?
Its funny how my mind goes into overload when I have things do. More packing...
But I had some time to reflect and I had to ask myself, what do I want for my future. I caught up with a friend in London recently. Funny enough you get to meet all sorts of people in London, new friends and old friends. This friend is not my friend really, he went to school with my beloved and had known him since he was seven. And so we talked about KL, the friends and the life we had (and they have) in KL. This friend has just gotten a new addition to his family, sold his old apartment which we rented when we lived in KL and is extending his nice bungalow in PJ. Another friend bought a new BMW, moving into a new seven bedroom house. Another friend also drives a BMW, bought a nice car for his wife and have a one year old son which I haven't seen. Everyone is getting on with life. What about us?
Apparently people do talk about us. Some wandered if we will ever go back to KL and my answer to that is, yes one fine day, we will ultimately retire in KL. But the time is not now because I want to see the world first.
I don't want to burden my life with who did what to whom, who said what to offend so and so. Or what X said about Y etc. I do like gossip myself, don't get me wrong, but I don't want my life to be ruled by all this back talking. I am a loner, I like my space and I will do things the way I like them.
We choose to live life on the path less travelled. We move from country to country, travel whenever we can. I don't like to compare myself with other people and their achievements but I do often ask myself, what do I want to do with my life next?
I decided that I want to become a better Muslim and learn more about my religion. You'd think its an easy task being in Saudi and all not but its not.
I also want to see Africa and South America. And perhaps revisit North America. Thats not to say that I will neglect Asia.
My hope for the future, is to catch a glimpse of every part of the world. As I am about to embark back to the Middle East, I hope to be able to see the pyramids and see a different face of the Middle East rather than just Saudi Arabia. I want to learn some Arabic so I'd be able to communicate and listen to what people are saying.  And perhaps the prayers that I utter would mean more to me than those verses which I have memorized since I was young.
I want to go for my pilgrimage, with an open heart, ready and willing.
As for Africa, its been a continent I have been shying away from. Well I want to see some of it as well. The same with South America.
I hope I will.

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