To provide the best I can, with all the information I have, for my child.
I want her to have a good stable foundation and grounding for her future.
I do this by loving her unconditionally on beautiful days as well as on cranky days.
I try to educate myself as much as possible to equip me for this role.
I must remember that she too has her own destiny and that the Universe, our creator will take care of not just her but us as well.
I will accept that everything happens for a reason. And often enough it is revealed to me the good or the reason something happens or don't happen.
There will be many times that I may not know what to do. But I will explore all possible options and look into all avenues to see what I can do.
In the meantime I must trust that things will work out. One way or the other.
And often, the test is to see how and in what way I will react to the tribulations of life.
I promise to keep an open mind and accept whatever journeys that may come upon us and to learn in whatever way I can, either from the journey itself, from the people I may meet or the places I may see.
I am truly grateful that there are always people around me who are like my angels, who helped to light up my path, one way or another.
I like that she has brought my journey to different paths and makes me see the world and the people around me in a different light.
You make me want to be a better person. You make me want to take care of myself so I can love you better.
And that is the greatest gift anyone can give to another.
Its a huge responsibility my child, and I love you more for it.
Showing posts with label Parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Parenting. Show all posts
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Friday, December 26, 2008
A mother's journey
Upon arrival at Changi airport, The Little One remarked, "Mummy, there are lots of people that look like Mark."
"That is true honey. Thats because we are in Singapore."
I suppose living most of her life in the middle east, she hasn't seen that many Chinese looking people in any one location. I wonder if Mark will be flattered that Amalina chose to identify him as quintessentially Singaporean.
******************
Last night when we reached home, she declared. "Mama, sometimes when someone leaves me, I'm a little bit sad."
Even though I was trying to prepare for bedtime, I had to stop and give her a moment.
"Why are you sad?"
"Because uncle Ariffin left me so I'm sad. I want to call my daddy to tell him I am sad."
Ariffin is my youngest brother who had gone to the zoo with her yesterday. I guess she must have enjoyed his company a lot.
What does a mother say about these things? There are no manuals for me to refer to.
So I offered, "Darling, its OK to be sad sometimes. The important thing is to be brave when you are sad. And tomorrow we will get to see him again."
*********
We visited a family in bereavement yesterday, and I tried to brief her on the way just to explain what she may be seeing.
"We are going to visit somebody who has just passed away," I told her.
"Did she passed away like your Mummy?" she asked.
"Yes and this lady was her friend."
How young or how old do you explain these things to a child?
It took me a long while to explain to her what passing away means.
*******
My child, I understand that you are trying to figure out the small jigsaw pieces that we call life. I am glad that you are sharing your curiosity with me. All I pray for is the strength and wisdom such that I can be a good companion on this journey with you.
"That is true honey. Thats because we are in Singapore."
I suppose living most of her life in the middle east, she hasn't seen that many Chinese looking people in any one location. I wonder if Mark will be flattered that Amalina chose to identify him as quintessentially Singaporean.
******************
Last night when we reached home, she declared. "Mama, sometimes when someone leaves me, I'm a little bit sad."
Even though I was trying to prepare for bedtime, I had to stop and give her a moment.
"Why are you sad?"
"Because uncle Ariffin left me so I'm sad. I want to call my daddy to tell him I am sad."
Ariffin is my youngest brother who had gone to the zoo with her yesterday. I guess she must have enjoyed his company a lot.
What does a mother say about these things? There are no manuals for me to refer to.
So I offered, "Darling, its OK to be sad sometimes. The important thing is to be brave when you are sad. And tomorrow we will get to see him again."
*********
We visited a family in bereavement yesterday, and I tried to brief her on the way just to explain what she may be seeing.
"We are going to visit somebody who has just passed away," I told her.
"Did she passed away like your Mummy?" she asked.
"Yes and this lady was her friend."
How young or how old do you explain these things to a child?
It took me a long while to explain to her what passing away means.
*******
My child, I understand that you are trying to figure out the small jigsaw pieces that we call life. I am glad that you are sharing your curiosity with me. All I pray for is the strength and wisdom such that I can be a good companion on this journey with you.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
I am at quandary
I am at quandary between changing the school for my daughter and keeping her where she is.
Why do I want to change?
The owner of the school and her sister who is one of the teachers in the school is showing too clearly how untrained and unexperienced they are. Most recent example, my daughter's finger was burnt with glue from a glue gun. Why do they have to use gun guns for a craft for 2 year olds is beyond me. They claimed that the glue gun is the only glue strong enough to put the button on the tin cans wrapped with crepe paper. She even went on to say that my little one was , I quote, their "guinea pig," the first child to do the craft and thus her finger because they didn't realize that the glue was hot.
How incredibly stupid!
Why I keep sending her there?
1)Convenience. The school is within the compound, thus 5 mins walk away.
2)Familiarity. The other children in the compound goes there too including my little one's best friend. She plays with them in school as well as in the afternoons at the skate park and play ground.
3)Cost factor. Sending her to a school outside the compound means more money on transport. That or we would have to get a driver.
In general she is doing well in school. Partly because she is used to it and partly because she is excited to see her best friend Mariam in school. She enjoys her singing sessions and I even caught her singing to herself. I often hear her chant "Eeee ya eee yaa yooo."
I am not the only one unhappy with the school. I guess us mothers tolerate it because its convenient. But I am not sure if I can live with myself with the excuse of convenience.
I have only just begun to enjoy my free time. Not that my time is free mind you, I have a planned schedule for everyday of the 3 days in school. If I didn't send her to school, I wouldn't have the time for my own self development with sewing, Reiki and Yoga. And I believe that I will be a better mother with all that.
And what do we do on the two days she isn't in school you asked? On Saturdays is our bonding time, either spent on the bus or whatever strikes us, be it painting, collecting flowers/leaves or even climbing trees.
And look what she was up to last Saturday:
We were examining the trunks of trees and she wanted to feel whats its like being on one.
And on Wednesdays, we have Kindermusik with Hanna,
Kindermusik is coming to an end though. We no longer will be doing Our Time but will switch to ABC and Me programme if we have 12 people together. I'm hoping that we can round out 12 people!
Are you interested?
Why do I want to change?
The owner of the school and her sister who is one of the teachers in the school is showing too clearly how untrained and unexperienced they are. Most recent example, my daughter's finger was burnt with glue from a glue gun. Why do they have to use gun guns for a craft for 2 year olds is beyond me. They claimed that the glue gun is the only glue strong enough to put the button on the tin cans wrapped with crepe paper. She even went on to say that my little one was , I quote, their "guinea pig," the first child to do the craft and thus her finger because they didn't realize that the glue was hot.
How incredibly stupid!
Why I keep sending her there?
1)Convenience. The school is within the compound, thus 5 mins walk away.
2)Familiarity. The other children in the compound goes there too including my little one's best friend. She plays with them in school as well as in the afternoons at the skate park and play ground.
3)Cost factor. Sending her to a school outside the compound means more money on transport. That or we would have to get a driver.
In general she is doing well in school. Partly because she is used to it and partly because she is excited to see her best friend Mariam in school. She enjoys her singing sessions and I even caught her singing to herself. I often hear her chant "Eeee ya eee yaa yooo."
I am not the only one unhappy with the school. I guess us mothers tolerate it because its convenient. But I am not sure if I can live with myself with the excuse of convenience.
I have only just begun to enjoy my free time. Not that my time is free mind you, I have a planned schedule for everyday of the 3 days in school. If I didn't send her to school, I wouldn't have the time for my own self development with sewing, Reiki and Yoga. And I believe that I will be a better mother with all that.
And what do we do on the two days she isn't in school you asked? On Saturdays is our bonding time, either spent on the bus or whatever strikes us, be it painting, collecting flowers/leaves or even climbing trees.
And look what she was up to last Saturday:
We were examining the trunks of trees and she wanted to feel whats its like being on one.
And on Wednesdays, we have Kindermusik with Hanna,
Kindermusik is coming to an end though. We no longer will be doing Our Time but will switch to ABC and Me programme if we have 12 people together. I'm hoping that we can round out 12 people!
Are you interested?
Saturday, March 01, 2008
Putting first things first
My Reiki Teacher Ang@ shared with me an excerpt from Stephen Covey's First things first. He describes a story that one of his associates experienced on a seminar.
In the middle of the lecture the presenter pulled out a wide-mouth jar and placed it on the table, aside to some fist-sized rocks.
"How many of these rocks do you think we can get in the jar?" he asked the audience.
After the students made their guesses, the seminar leader said,
"Okay, let's find out." He put one rock in the jar, then another, then another--until no more rocks would fit. Then he asked, "Is the jar full?"
Everybody could see that not one more of the rocks would fit, so they said, "Yes."
"Not so fast," he cautioned. From under the table he lifted out a bucket of gravel, dumped it in the jar, and shook it. The gravel slid into all the little spaces left by the big rocks. Grinning, the seminar leader asked once more, "Is the jar full?"
A little wiser by now, the students responded, "Probably not."
"Good," the teacher said. Then he reached under the table to bring up a bucket of sand. He started dumping the sand in the jar. While the students watched, the sand filled in the little spaces left by the rocks and gravel. Once more he looked at the class and said, "Now,
is the jar full?"
"No," everyone shouted back.
"Good!" said the seminar leader, who then grabbed a pitcher of water and began to pour it into the jar. He got a quart of water into that jar before he said, "Ladies and gentlemen, the jar is now full. Can anybody tell me the lesson you can learn from this?"
An eager participant spoke up: "Well, there are gaps in your schedule. And if you really work at it, you can always fit more into your life."
"No," the leader said. "That's not the point. The point is this: if I hadn't put those big rocks in first, I would never have gotten them in."
+++++++++++++++++++++++
The story made me think about my big rocks. What are they? And what should I put in first?
My beloved, my little one and my family of course. Then comes my quilting, my reading, my travelling and maybe even my writing. Self improvement also comes in first. I want to be the best person I can be, who is happy, contented and connected. Intellectual development and personal growth. And achieving my dreams and goals.
To have financial independence, to have the house of my dream, to travel all the time to different places, new and old, and to love and be loved. To be an inspiration to my child and at the same time have the capability to inspire her to be the best person she can be in her life. To support her to achieve her full potential.
And my darling, we didn't name you our hope for nothing. We hope that you will achieve better things than we can and go to places we haven't been, even if it is the moon.
I always want you to know that we love you and will always believe in you.
++++++++++++++++++++
I brought some wonderful books back from Dubai. Will have to blog about my Dubai trip at a later time. Although the trip was very short, I am very grateful that I have a wonderful and understanding DH who supports me in my interest.
I do digress. I am reading Weekend Life Coach by Lynda Field and oh boy, she is opening some doors for me.
In the middle of the lecture the presenter pulled out a wide-mouth jar and placed it on the table, aside to some fist-sized rocks.
"How many of these rocks do you think we can get in the jar?" he asked the audience.
After the students made their guesses, the seminar leader said,
"Okay, let's find out." He put one rock in the jar, then another, then another--until no more rocks would fit. Then he asked, "Is the jar full?"
Everybody could see that not one more of the rocks would fit, so they said, "Yes."
"Not so fast," he cautioned. From under the table he lifted out a bucket of gravel, dumped it in the jar, and shook it. The gravel slid into all the little spaces left by the big rocks. Grinning, the seminar leader asked once more, "Is the jar full?"
A little wiser by now, the students responded, "Probably not."
"Good," the teacher said. Then he reached under the table to bring up a bucket of sand. He started dumping the sand in the jar. While the students watched, the sand filled in the little spaces left by the rocks and gravel. Once more he looked at the class and said, "Now,
is the jar full?"
"No," everyone shouted back.
"Good!" said the seminar leader, who then grabbed a pitcher of water and began to pour it into the jar. He got a quart of water into that jar before he said, "Ladies and gentlemen, the jar is now full. Can anybody tell me the lesson you can learn from this?"
An eager participant spoke up: "Well, there are gaps in your schedule. And if you really work at it, you can always fit more into your life."
"No," the leader said. "That's not the point. The point is this: if I hadn't put those big rocks in first, I would never have gotten them in."
+++++++++++++++++++++++
The story made me think about my big rocks. What are they? And what should I put in first?
My beloved, my little one and my family of course. Then comes my quilting, my reading, my travelling and maybe even my writing. Self improvement also comes in first. I want to be the best person I can be, who is happy, contented and connected. Intellectual development and personal growth. And achieving my dreams and goals.
To have financial independence, to have the house of my dream, to travel all the time to different places, new and old, and to love and be loved. To be an inspiration to my child and at the same time have the capability to inspire her to be the best person she can be in her life. To support her to achieve her full potential.
And my darling, we didn't name you our hope for nothing. We hope that you will achieve better things than we can and go to places we haven't been, even if it is the moon.
I always want you to know that we love you and will always believe in you.
++++++++++++++++++++
I brought some wonderful books back from Dubai. Will have to blog about my Dubai trip at a later time. Although the trip was very short, I am very grateful that I have a wonderful and understanding DH who supports me in my interest.
I do digress. I am reading Weekend Life Coach by Lynda Field and oh boy, she is opening some doors for me.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
She likes school!
I am happy to announce that my Little One now enjoys school! She stopped crying when I dropped her off this week and even walked in willingly to greet her teacher. My DH was so amazed when he dropped The Little One in school this morning because she walked in all by herself without saying good bye to him.
I am also so grateful that we have a wonderful Kindermusik session going on. The Little One goes on Wednesdays with me and she seems to be enjoying the sessions tremendously. In fact she often asks, "Where is teacher Hanna?"
So much so I have started to sew again and have some time to myself. My schedule is packed jammed full that I just sometimes forget to stop and do nothing! Saturday mornings are for the shopping bus, Sunday for box making/quilting, Monday for Reiki, Tuesdays for Yoga and Wednesdays for Kindermusik. And I have the Guild once a month and Tuesday evenings for Quilting again.
I am so grateful for the full ane enriching life I have and a daughter who is growing into a brilliant gem as each day passes by.
I am also so grateful that we have a wonderful Kindermusik session going on. The Little One goes on Wednesdays with me and she seems to be enjoying the sessions tremendously. In fact she often asks, "Where is teacher Hanna?"
So much so I have started to sew again and have some time to myself. My schedule is packed jammed full that I just sometimes forget to stop and do nothing! Saturday mornings are for the shopping bus, Sunday for box making/quilting, Monday for Reiki, Tuesdays for Yoga and Wednesdays for Kindermusik. And I have the Guild once a month and Tuesday evenings for Quilting again.
I am so grateful for the full ane enriching life I have and a daughter who is growing into a brilliant gem as each day passes by.
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
My 18 month comprehends what goes around her
The Little One has been suffering from a high fever and on the fourth day we brought her to the Doctor. After a brief physical he prescribed an antibiotic shot and asked us to come back the following day for a checkup.
SO I brought her back to the hospital the following day and she OK at the waiting area. Once the nurse called out her name and ushered us to the weighing area The Little One started crying. I guess she remembered distinctly the nurse who administered her the shot the day before. I tried to calm her down and managed to do so in the room 4. But once the nurse ushered us to room 2, where she was examined the day prior she started bawling her eyes out and there was no way of consoling her!
As soon as the doctor entered the room she started to point to the door going, "There! There!" Obviously telling me that she wanted out!
So I told her, "AM you have to stop crying. We will leave this room after I finish the conversation with the doctor. I need to talk to the doctor and we will leave as soon as we finish." With that she calmed down a little bit.
So the doctor and I discussed a little bit. Since her fever did not return there was no need for a second injection. The Little One who was sobbing quietly suddenly got a little louder when she heard the word "INJECTION." I had to laugh there and then. I had to explain to the nurse and doctor that she understood "Injection."
So the Doctor obliged by saying, "OK NO injection today."
And the Little One stopped crying. She could even muster "Bye!" to the nurses on the way out!
I really have to be careful what I say and do because she understand everything perfectly and I attribute all this entirely to attachment parenting!
Update:
Unfortunately I found rashes on the front and back of her torso in the afternoon. There was none behind her ears. I guess we may have to pay the Doctor a visit again tomorrow. :(
SO I brought her back to the hospital the following day and she OK at the waiting area. Once the nurse called out her name and ushered us to the weighing area The Little One started crying. I guess she remembered distinctly the nurse who administered her the shot the day before. I tried to calm her down and managed to do so in the room 4. But once the nurse ushered us to room 2, where she was examined the day prior she started bawling her eyes out and there was no way of consoling her!
As soon as the doctor entered the room she started to point to the door going, "There! There!" Obviously telling me that she wanted out!
So I told her, "AM you have to stop crying. We will leave this room after I finish the conversation with the doctor. I need to talk to the doctor and we will leave as soon as we finish." With that she calmed down a little bit.
So the doctor and I discussed a little bit. Since her fever did not return there was no need for a second injection. The Little One who was sobbing quietly suddenly got a little louder when she heard the word "INJECTION." I had to laugh there and then. I had to explain to the nurse and doctor that she understood "Injection."
So the Doctor obliged by saying, "OK NO injection today."
And the Little One stopped crying. She could even muster "Bye!" to the nurses on the way out!
I really have to be careful what I say and do because she understand everything perfectly and I attribute all this entirely to attachment parenting!
Update:
Unfortunately I found rashes on the front and back of her torso in the afternoon. There was none behind her ears. I guess we may have to pay the Doctor a visit again tomorrow. :(
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