Somehow The Little had the inkling that I was having a long weekend.
"Mummy I want to stay with you at home," she cried and she clutched on my arm.
"But darling, if you stay at home then I won't be able to send you to school," I answered.
"And you will pick me up too?" she asked.
"Of course I will," I answered.
And so she slept. She is finally sleeping in her own bed albeit its still in our room. She had requested that she wanted a Charlie and Lola bed sheet and she will sleep with Charlie and Lola.
On the bus this morning she exclaimed, "Oh mummy. Today is a special day isn't it because you are sending me to school," she commented.
"And you will fetch me from school later right?" she asked.
I sure will.
Days like this sometimes make me wonder that perhaps I should be at home with my child.
But its just 5 more weeks before summer holidays and she will be joining me in my school in August anyways.
I have to say that me getting this job is actually a rezeki for her as much as it is mine.
She has blossomed really well at her Preschool. She now recognizes some of the alphabets and all of the numbers. Her motor skills are developing well and her social skills are improving.
Because Mommy has to go to work myself my Little One recognizes that we all have "jobs" to do and schools to go to. There were many days when she was tempted to skip school (as what her best friend often does) but couldn't because there was no one else at home to look after her.
But I have to confess that I do miss my social life. There are friends whom I haven't talked to in ages. Friends whom I used to hangout with, I just see occasionally. I no longer know who my neighbours are because I no longer use the shopping bus. I haven't sewn or done anything creative in ages. I come home tired. I still have to cook and spend time with my child. Somedays I feel like I'm on the treadmill and I play catch up during the weekend for groceries etc.
However, I am very grateful that I am working because I want to, and not because I need to.
And I am grateful that I've been given this opportunity because not everyone who wants to have the same chance.
So I will spend today being grateful that I have the day off and that I can fetch my daughter from school. And be grateful tomorrow that I have a job that I love doing.
Alhamdullilah.
Showing posts with label Gratitute. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gratitute. Show all posts
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
She is saying grass...
"Did you know that our daughter says grass in school?"
"Grass? What grass?" I muttered, caught by surprise.
"So what do you do when you say grass in school Little One?"
"We thank God for our friends and our food," she answered as she hopped around the kitchen like a bunny.
Bells were ringing a little. Some how saying grace (to us) does have a Christian connotation. Is my child being taught values of a religion which may be different from ours? So how come I didn't blink when they had Santa come to the school and I am somewhat uncomfortable that they are saying grace?
Surely it is a Muslim quality to be thankful and grateful for what we have? Isn't it why we are encouraged to say Alhamdullilah as much as we can?
So we had to ask her exactly what they say when they say grace.
"We say thank you for our friends and our food." Is that all? Anything else?
Its not that I mind her being thankful for her friends and her food. In fact I do encourage her to appreciate and be grateful for what we have.
Just last week she has begun to ask me questions like, "Can we eat pig?"
"No darling, we don't eat pork because we are Muslims."
Should we explain to her more? How much more?
I guess she is telling us it is time for us to teach her more about our faith. She understands that when we hear the prayer call, its "Solat" or time to pray and often asks to pray with us.
I am grateful that she is sent to us not only to bring us joy and strength, but also a reminder such that we can be better people ourselves.
I pray that God gives us the strength and light to teach her the best we can. Not just values of the religion but values that will build the strength of her character that will allow her to make good choices in all aspects of her life.
I would like to think that I am teaching her a world full of unity and similarities and not be afraid of diversity and differences, be it culture or religion.
My daughter, you do put me in a pickle sometimes. It is a precious gift that a person give to another when you make me want to be a better person so I can be a better example for you.
Its tough being a parent! And I am grateful for the opportunity
And most times times it is my little one who is teaching me to be a better parent!
"Grass? What grass?" I muttered, caught by surprise.
"So what do you do when you say grass in school Little One?"
"We thank God for our friends and our food," she answered as she hopped around the kitchen like a bunny.
Bells were ringing a little. Some how saying grace (to us) does have a Christian connotation. Is my child being taught values of a religion which may be different from ours? So how come I didn't blink when they had Santa come to the school and I am somewhat uncomfortable that they are saying grace?
Surely it is a Muslim quality to be thankful and grateful for what we have? Isn't it why we are encouraged to say Alhamdullilah as much as we can?
So we had to ask her exactly what they say when they say grace.
"We say thank you for our friends and our food." Is that all? Anything else?
Its not that I mind her being thankful for her friends and her food. In fact I do encourage her to appreciate and be grateful for what we have.
Just last week she has begun to ask me questions like, "Can we eat pig?"
"No darling, we don't eat pork because we are Muslims."
Should we explain to her more? How much more?
I guess she is telling us it is time for us to teach her more about our faith. She understands that when we hear the prayer call, its "Solat" or time to pray and often asks to pray with us.
I am grateful that she is sent to us not only to bring us joy and strength, but also a reminder such that we can be better people ourselves.
I pray that God gives us the strength and light to teach her the best we can. Not just values of the religion but values that will build the strength of her character that will allow her to make good choices in all aspects of her life.
I would like to think that I am teaching her a world full of unity and similarities and not be afraid of diversity and differences, be it culture or religion.
My daughter, you do put me in a pickle sometimes. It is a precious gift that a person give to another when you make me want to be a better person so I can be a better example for you.
Its tough being a parent! And I am grateful for the opportunity
And most times times it is my little one who is teaching me to be a better parent!
Sunday, March 01, 2009
Always for a reason
I cannot tell you how many times I walked past the bookshelf with the books, "Tuesdays with Morrie." It is something that I would normally pick up but I didn't. The time didn't feel right. The book did not call my name.
It just happened that a friend had borrowed a book from a neighbor and I was the intercessor. And the book came to me. I had a weekend when plans had to be shelved. My body seemingly tired. Sulking I buried myself in the book. And oh boy, the words just snowed me under.
If anything, it pointed out to me that I have nothing to sulk about. I have everything to celebrate about my life. And I should embrace and celebrate every minute I can before the inevitable happens.
Here are some of my favorite bits of the books which I want to remember. To remind myself every now and then because the book would have to go forth and bring wisdom to the next reader.
"Do the kinds of things that come from the heart. When you do, you won't be dissatisfied, you won't be envious, you won't be longing for somebody else's things. On the contrary, you'll be overwhelmed with what comes back." pg128
I believe in paying it forward and I believe what you put out there is what you get in return. And I always must remind myself, whatever it is i do has to be Ikhlas, or sincere. From my heart. I should not recount it later but just to cast it out to the wind and forget all about it.
"Part of the problem, Mitch, is that everyone is in such a hurry," Morrie said. "People haven't found meaning in their lives, so they're running all the time looking for it. They think the next car, the next house, the nest job. Then they find those things are empty, too, and they keep running."
Once you start running, I said, it's hard to slow yourself down. Pg 136
I must remember to slow down. To take each day as it comes and not try to rush and cram everything in all at once. Sometimes I feel bogged down by implied expectations. Implied because I know too well myself that its an expectation that I thought was expected of me.
I must remember that its OK to say no. That I don't have to say yes all the time to please other people.
To always take a moment and ask my heart, myself, do I want to do this? So that I am not constantly running on a treadmill on a road to nowhere.
If we saw each other as more alike, we might be eager to join in one big human family in this world, and to care about that family the way we care about our own. pg 156
Its Ok for me to love other people and its OK for them not to love me back. Because the love will come back to me, in other ways and avenues I can't anticipate.
There is no formula to relationships. They have to be negotiated in loving ways, with room for both parties, what they want and what they need, what they can do and what their life is like.
Love us when you are as concerned about someone else's situation as you are your own. pg 178
If not, more ...
I am grateful that the book came to me. Right to my door.
It just happened that a friend had borrowed a book from a neighbor and I was the intercessor. And the book came to me. I had a weekend when plans had to be shelved. My body seemingly tired. Sulking I buried myself in the book. And oh boy, the words just snowed me under.
If anything, it pointed out to me that I have nothing to sulk about. I have everything to celebrate about my life. And I should embrace and celebrate every minute I can before the inevitable happens.
Here are some of my favorite bits of the books which I want to remember. To remind myself every now and then because the book would have to go forth and bring wisdom to the next reader.
"Do the kinds of things that come from the heart. When you do, you won't be dissatisfied, you won't be envious, you won't be longing for somebody else's things. On the contrary, you'll be overwhelmed with what comes back." pg128
I believe in paying it forward and I believe what you put out there is what you get in return. And I always must remind myself, whatever it is i do has to be Ikhlas, or sincere. From my heart. I should not recount it later but just to cast it out to the wind and forget all about it.
"Part of the problem, Mitch, is that everyone is in such a hurry," Morrie said. "People haven't found meaning in their lives, so they're running all the time looking for it. They think the next car, the next house, the nest job. Then they find those things are empty, too, and they keep running."
Once you start running, I said, it's hard to slow yourself down. Pg 136
I must remember to slow down. To take each day as it comes and not try to rush and cram everything in all at once. Sometimes I feel bogged down by implied expectations. Implied because I know too well myself that its an expectation that I thought was expected of me.
I must remember that its OK to say no. That I don't have to say yes all the time to please other people.
To always take a moment and ask my heart, myself, do I want to do this? So that I am not constantly running on a treadmill on a road to nowhere.
If we saw each other as more alike, we might be eager to join in one big human family in this world, and to care about that family the way we care about our own. pg 156
Its Ok for me to love other people and its OK for them not to love me back. Because the love will come back to me, in other ways and avenues I can't anticipate.
There is no formula to relationships. They have to be negotiated in loving ways, with room for both parties, what they want and what they need, what they can do and what their life is like.
Love us when you are as concerned about someone else's situation as you are your own. pg 178
If not, more ...
I am grateful that the book came to me. Right to my door.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
All I want is .....
To provide the best I can, with all the information I have, for my child.
I want her to have a good stable foundation and grounding for her future.
I do this by loving her unconditionally on beautiful days as well as on cranky days.
I try to educate myself as much as possible to equip me for this role.
I must remember that she too has her own destiny and that the Universe, our creator will take care of not just her but us as well.
I will accept that everything happens for a reason. And often enough it is revealed to me the good or the reason something happens or don't happen.
There will be many times that I may not know what to do. But I will explore all possible options and look into all avenues to see what I can do.
In the meantime I must trust that things will work out. One way or the other.
And often, the test is to see how and in what way I will react to the tribulations of life.
I promise to keep an open mind and accept whatever journeys that may come upon us and to learn in whatever way I can, either from the journey itself, from the people I may meet or the places I may see.
I am truly grateful that there are always people around me who are like my angels, who helped to light up my path, one way or another.
I like that she has brought my journey to different paths and makes me see the world and the people around me in a different light.
You make me want to be a better person. You make me want to take care of myself so I can love you better.
And that is the greatest gift anyone can give to another.
Its a huge responsibility my child, and I love you more for it.
I want her to have a good stable foundation and grounding for her future.
I do this by loving her unconditionally on beautiful days as well as on cranky days.
I try to educate myself as much as possible to equip me for this role.
I must remember that she too has her own destiny and that the Universe, our creator will take care of not just her but us as well.
I will accept that everything happens for a reason. And often enough it is revealed to me the good or the reason something happens or don't happen.
There will be many times that I may not know what to do. But I will explore all possible options and look into all avenues to see what I can do.
In the meantime I must trust that things will work out. One way or the other.
And often, the test is to see how and in what way I will react to the tribulations of life.
I promise to keep an open mind and accept whatever journeys that may come upon us and to learn in whatever way I can, either from the journey itself, from the people I may meet or the places I may see.
I am truly grateful that there are always people around me who are like my angels, who helped to light up my path, one way or another.
I like that she has brought my journey to different paths and makes me see the world and the people around me in a different light.
You make me want to be a better person. You make me want to take care of myself so I can love you better.
And that is the greatest gift anyone can give to another.
Its a huge responsibility my child, and I love you more for it.
Saturday, February 07, 2009
Remembering to be grateful
The days in a week seemed to just fuse and melt away together. The weekend is filled with errands and things to do.
I was asked recently, "Why are you so busy?"
I was taken aback by the question.
"Busy right now? Because I am ordering teh tarik or being busy in general?"
Busy because I am working?
I am often surprised when others remarked to me, "Its good now that you are working, It gives you something to do so you're not bored."
Bored? Something to do?
Thing is, I was already busy even when I was not working. I always had something to do. Books to read. Blogs to read. Projects to do be it sewing or other craft related. Travel plans. Emails to write. And most importantly, raising my child. I do not believe that one can ever be bored while raising a child. There is so much to do. Meals to cook. Cakes to bake. Books to read. Activities to plan. Research to read, plan and implement.
I apologize if I cannot empathize with people who says they are bored and claims that they have nothing to do. There is always something to do. Even prayers take time and boy I have lots of prayers to do. Doesn't everyone? Irregardless what religion they are?
Of course some questions were raised before why I needed to work. For me, the opportunity came by chance, through the goodwill of friends and acquaintances to my lap. And perhaps I am one of those people who is always game to try something new and/or different. (Perhaps thats the reason I seldom have time to be bored?)
I did it both for me and my child. I needed to know that my brain still works. There were days I could not string sentences properly together. There were times I thought some brain cells were permanently lost. And I wanted my child to see that women can work too if they wanted to. And to give my child the space so that she knows she is capable of having fun without mummy around.
I've seen how she is a different person when I am not there. It made her grow up a little so to speak. She is not whinny when I'm not there. Suddenly she sees me, she goes, "Mummy please carry me."
This works for us. I may not recommend it for everyone but for the moment this works for us and I am grateful.
Of course there were many mornings I wish I could just sleep in. Or when my child is sick I wish I can tend her at home.
Whatever it is, I constantly have to remind myself as I am doing so now, is that I must always be grateful for the life Allah has given me. For the opportunities he presented to me. For the people and friends I get to meet. For the good health we have. For the happiness we enjoy. For the wonderful food on our table. For everything.
I am only human and I try to do my best with whatever I can. Its very easy to get into a complaining mode (which I initially thought I was going to do) but I must constantly remind myself, how much more wonderful it is for me to be grateful.
I am grateful that my weekends are just so fast that it seems something just pops up for us to do.
Good or bad, I am grateful.
Alhamdullilah. Alhamdullilah. Alhamdullilah.
What's on your gratitude list today?
I was asked recently, "Why are you so busy?"
I was taken aback by the question.
"Busy right now? Because I am ordering teh tarik or being busy in general?"
Busy because I am working?
I am often surprised when others remarked to me, "Its good now that you are working, It gives you something to do so you're not bored."
Bored? Something to do?
Thing is, I was already busy even when I was not working. I always had something to do. Books to read. Blogs to read. Projects to do be it sewing or other craft related. Travel plans. Emails to write. And most importantly, raising my child. I do not believe that one can ever be bored while raising a child. There is so much to do. Meals to cook. Cakes to bake. Books to read. Activities to plan. Research to read, plan and implement.
I apologize if I cannot empathize with people who says they are bored and claims that they have nothing to do. There is always something to do. Even prayers take time and boy I have lots of prayers to do. Doesn't everyone? Irregardless what religion they are?
Of course some questions were raised before why I needed to work. For me, the opportunity came by chance, through the goodwill of friends and acquaintances to my lap. And perhaps I am one of those people who is always game to try something new and/or different. (Perhaps thats the reason I seldom have time to be bored?)
I did it both for me and my child. I needed to know that my brain still works. There were days I could not string sentences properly together. There were times I thought some brain cells were permanently lost. And I wanted my child to see that women can work too if they wanted to. And to give my child the space so that she knows she is capable of having fun without mummy around.
I've seen how she is a different person when I am not there. It made her grow up a little so to speak. She is not whinny when I'm not there. Suddenly she sees me, she goes, "Mummy please carry me."
This works for us. I may not recommend it for everyone but for the moment this works for us and I am grateful.
Of course there were many mornings I wish I could just sleep in. Or when my child is sick I wish I can tend her at home.
Whatever it is, I constantly have to remind myself as I am doing so now, is that I must always be grateful for the life Allah has given me. For the opportunities he presented to me. For the people and friends I get to meet. For the good health we have. For the happiness we enjoy. For the wonderful food on our table. For everything.
I am only human and I try to do my best with whatever I can. Its very easy to get into a complaining mode (which I initially thought I was going to do) but I must constantly remind myself, how much more wonderful it is for me to be grateful.
I am grateful that my weekends are just so fast that it seems something just pops up for us to do.
Good or bad, I am grateful.
Alhamdullilah. Alhamdullilah. Alhamdullilah.
What's on your gratitude list today?
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
What my friends taught me...
That we all have our own struggles in our lives. The difference is what we make of it. Do we try to overcome it with a positive light or do we get all depressed and upset with the world? The choice is ours.
Thanks for sharing. I'll remember that as my life lesson.
Thanks for sharing. I'll remember that as my life lesson.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
My friends inspire me and have hearts of gold
They reminded me how wonderful it is again to laugh like teenagers again. Both remembering old times when we were students chatting in front of our computers or even of stories of life present. They remind me what being mature is all about yet the importance of feeling young again.
They show me what acceptance is all about in friendship. We accept each other for whom we are, try to overlook flaws and live with it.
And the generosity of their spirit humbles me.
I am lucky that they kept me around all these years.
Thanks so much you guys! I really had a wonderful time despite having a *cold*, not having a *plan*, seeing a wonderful *perform*ance. What other words did I miss out?
I also appreciate my friends who opened their doors to me, drove a long way to meet up and bringing/cooking such wonderful and delicious fare.
I just can't say more except thank you, thank you and thank you. Thank you for your generosity towards me, I really do appreciate it.
They show me what acceptance is all about in friendship. We accept each other for whom we are, try to overlook flaws and live with it.
And the generosity of their spirit humbles me.
I am lucky that they kept me around all these years.
Thanks so much you guys! I really had a wonderful time despite having a *cold*, not having a *plan*, seeing a wonderful *perform*ance. What other words did I miss out?
I also appreciate my friends who opened their doors to me, drove a long way to meet up and bringing/cooking such wonderful and delicious fare.
I just can't say more except thank you, thank you and thank you. Thank you for your generosity towards me, I really do appreciate it.
Saturday, December 13, 2008
I'm suppose to be packing but I am procrastinating
I leave tomorrow night. I have two opened suitcases, half empty, half full. One is half empty because I haven't finished unpacking from my latest Bahrain trip. The other is half full, because I have filled them with some gifts, bric-a-bracs I have gathered as gifts to bring home.
Its so easy for me to get sidetracked somehow. While trying to pack underwear for the trip, I decided to clear out the drawer of old underwear I haven't used for a long time or those that are ready to retire. Can't explain this further except I had a great satisfaction in pulling out those old things and throwing them out. Gave me a sense of freedom. Afterall I've just been buying new ones and not throwing out the old ones making it very hard to open and close that drawer. My excuse was lack of time.
Instead of going back to packing, I inspired my DH to clear our his closet too, of clothes that no longer fit or should no longer be worn. We did quite well I have to say.
I have decided that I will throw out my old clothes that don't make me look good or don't look good on me. The past three years I didn't have time to look after myself or how I look. I wore clothes that was comfortable rather than flattering. Somedays I didn't even have time to comb my hair let alone look at myself in the mirror.
And shopping here doesn't help either. Without a changing room to try the clothes I sometimes end up keeping some clothes that fit but don't look too great on me because I couldn't be bothered to return to the Mall the nth time to change the clothes.
So my job offer came to me at the most opportune moment. Just as I decided I am ready to be a person again and not just a mother and a wife, the offer came. Work somehow gave me the a reason to revisit my old life in terms of wearing my old office clothes again. Clothes haven't been worn much since I got here. Clothes that represented my old life, life before motherhood. [And not just the clothes, I get to use my brain again, as well as my old skills, some have been rusty.]
Anyways I am digressing. I'm thinking about clothes because I am not sure what to pack. I realize that I have different clothes for different occasion and different places. Some clothes that I am most comfortable with in London would not be suitable in KL. Some clothes I wear here wouldn't do back home. Afterall I have been going to the Mall with my pajamas under my abaya! My clothes needn't be matching since no one else was going to see them right?
I found some clothes I bought on trips back home and never used it since I got back here. I think I will be packing those and if I don't wear them this trip either, perhaps its a good reason to get rid of them!
Somehow it just occur to me that perhaps I am a chameleon. I have a different clothes (appearance/roles) for different people and different location? Am I inconsistent or do I just try to fit in with the location/situation?
So much so for a short entry before packing! Thats food for thought on a different day coz I'd better go back to packing. Whatever it is I am grateful that I have the opportunity to try out different things, live and travel at different places. Thank you God, thank you for all the opportunities that you have presented me with! There should be no room in my life for complains but rather lots to be grateful about!
Its so easy for me to get sidetracked somehow. While trying to pack underwear for the trip, I decided to clear out the drawer of old underwear I haven't used for a long time or those that are ready to retire. Can't explain this further except I had a great satisfaction in pulling out those old things and throwing them out. Gave me a sense of freedom. Afterall I've just been buying new ones and not throwing out the old ones making it very hard to open and close that drawer. My excuse was lack of time.
Instead of going back to packing, I inspired my DH to clear our his closet too, of clothes that no longer fit or should no longer be worn. We did quite well I have to say.
I have decided that I will throw out my old clothes that don't make me look good or don't look good on me. The past three years I didn't have time to look after myself or how I look. I wore clothes that was comfortable rather than flattering. Somedays I didn't even have time to comb my hair let alone look at myself in the mirror.
And shopping here doesn't help either. Without a changing room to try the clothes I sometimes end up keeping some clothes that fit but don't look too great on me because I couldn't be bothered to return to the Mall the nth time to change the clothes.
So my job offer came to me at the most opportune moment. Just as I decided I am ready to be a person again and not just a mother and a wife, the offer came. Work somehow gave me the a reason to revisit my old life in terms of wearing my old office clothes again. Clothes haven't been worn much since I got here. Clothes that represented my old life, life before motherhood. [And not just the clothes, I get to use my brain again, as well as my old skills, some have been rusty.]
Anyways I am digressing. I'm thinking about clothes because I am not sure what to pack. I realize that I have different clothes for different occasion and different places. Some clothes that I am most comfortable with in London would not be suitable in KL. Some clothes I wear here wouldn't do back home. Afterall I have been going to the Mall with my pajamas under my abaya! My clothes needn't be matching since no one else was going to see them right?
I found some clothes I bought on trips back home and never used it since I got back here. I think I will be packing those and if I don't wear them this trip either, perhaps its a good reason to get rid of them!
Somehow it just occur to me that perhaps I am a chameleon. I have a different clothes (appearance/roles) for different people and different location? Am I inconsistent or do I just try to fit in with the location/situation?
So much so for a short entry before packing! Thats food for thought on a different day coz I'd better go back to packing. Whatever it is I am grateful that I have the opportunity to try out different things, live and travel at different places. Thank you God, thank you for all the opportunities that you have presented me with! There should be no room in my life for complains but rather lots to be grateful about!
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Joys of motherhood
Being a first time mum, away from my immediate family members and without the direction of my mum to consult, my road to motherhood has been partially trial and error and partially research from books and the Internet. I have Google to be thankful for, without it there would have been many more trips to the Doctors or the Emergency Room.
For instance the first time The Little One had nosebleed. Not knowing it was merely nosebleed, I panicked when I woke up with blood on the pillow cases and duvet cover. Woke up my DH who also panicked and agreed to drive us to the Emergency Room.
When we arrived, the male nurse asked, "Did your child fall?"
"No."
"Any fever?"
"No."
"Did she hit her head somewhere?"
"No."
"Can I see her fingers?"
"Sure." (Wandering if some diseases could be diagnosed by looking at finger.)
"Its just nosebleed as she digs her nose."
"Oh! Thank you!" we cried, so relieved that it was not some sort of terminal disease
Experience has made us wiser after that. I stocked myself up with some books that I can refer to and to educate me on what could ail my child. I also developed an interest on homeopathy which sometimes prove to be very useful.
However preschool and weaning has increased my child's susceptibility to being sick. Just about a month ago all 3 of us became sick. It started with The Little One who had a ear infection, then my DH who had cough and fever that developed into Asthma. And I developed acute bronchitis. It wasn't fun the 3 of us on the bed sick and woozy but we all got better and got on with our lives.
So I thought it is all over for this season but just 3 days ago, appropriately on the morning of Eid, The Little One has fever again. This time as high as 40.4 oC. The now somewhat experienced mom does not panic as much and decided to use the suppository, left over from the last time, to bring the fever down. But it does become worrying when the fever does not subside after 3 days. Unfortunately most of the clinics are closed due to the Eid holidays so we brought them to the Emergency Room again.
This time its tonsillitis and just like the precious time, my DH seems to be affected as well. Here I am, wife and mother having to look after my babies. Appropriately timed as well as I am unprepared for my trip home in 3 days.
If anything I like to look on the positive side of things. Perhaps them being sick will make good excuse to my friends and relatives back home whom I have not had time to shop gifts for. It also gives me some time to reflect and be grateful for little things in life such as friendship for instance.
I am grateful for the friends I who has become our family. Through them I get the friendship and support I need, who reassured me and gave me pointers and shared their experiences with me. And they continue to do so without expecting anything in return and providing me with understanding and patience. Sometimes I seemed to abandon them, as I was too busy or too absorbed in my own trials and tribulations. Life just sometimes take over and time seemed to fly by and suddenly I realized that I neglected my friends.
Instead of abandoning me, they welcome me back with welcome arms, with warmth and love, whenever I do come back to them. Making me so welcomed, telling me in all sorts of ways that my company was missed. Some even offered me all sort of tips and help when they heard about my situation. And I fell so loved and so grateful that I've been blessed with wonderful friends like these around me.
Dear God, I am grateful that I have been given the opportunity to be a mother and a wife. And I am even more grateful for the wonderful friends you blessed me with. They have kept me sane, gave me all sorts of invaluable advice, not just those near me, but those who are geographically far from me but near to my heart.
My friends, you know who you are and I thank you for sharing with me your wisdom, love and friendship.
For my Little One, I hope you'll get well soon and know that you will be a much stronger person, both physically and mentally after this. Just remember to wash your hands more often and stay away from people who sneeze and cough!
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I'm off to sp0re and Malays/a for 2 weeks. It will be hectic, 6 days with my in laws in KL and 5 days in Sp0re. It will be my first trip, just me and The Little One and I hope God will give me strength to survive the trip.
To my friends in KL, my driver is unable to come this trip so I will be at the mercy of my in laws when it comes to transport. If you guys can come by BB Bangi, I look forward to meeting up with you. I'm in town 16 - 22 Dec, except I may be busy on the 21 due to a cousin's wedding.
To my friends in sp0re, lets try to meet up one morning/evening together with everybody? My itinerary includes trips to Nigh safari, Zoo, Orchard Road, maybe Sentosa, Gyboree and some family obligations. Please also understand that my schedule would also be determined by the health and cooperation of my 3 year old. I'm in town 23 - 27 Dec.
I look forward to meeting up you guys! Wish me luck!
Unfortunately I do not have a local number yet, I plan to buy a new sim card when I arrive. You can text me your number to +966 lima kosong 816 three four 52 by Sunday.
For instance the first time The Little One had nosebleed. Not knowing it was merely nosebleed, I panicked when I woke up with blood on the pillow cases and duvet cover. Woke up my DH who also panicked and agreed to drive us to the Emergency Room.
When we arrived, the male nurse asked, "Did your child fall?"
"No."
"Any fever?"
"No."
"Did she hit her head somewhere?"
"No."
"Can I see her fingers?"
"Sure." (Wandering if some diseases could be diagnosed by looking at finger.)
"Its just nosebleed as she digs her nose."
"Oh! Thank you!" we cried, so relieved that it was not some sort of terminal disease
Experience has made us wiser after that. I stocked myself up with some books that I can refer to and to educate me on what could ail my child. I also developed an interest on homeopathy which sometimes prove to be very useful.
However preschool and weaning has increased my child's susceptibility to being sick. Just about a month ago all 3 of us became sick. It started with The Little One who had a ear infection, then my DH who had cough and fever that developed into Asthma. And I developed acute bronchitis. It wasn't fun the 3 of us on the bed sick and woozy but we all got better and got on with our lives.
So I thought it is all over for this season but just 3 days ago, appropriately on the morning of Eid, The Little One has fever again. This time as high as 40.4 oC. The now somewhat experienced mom does not panic as much and decided to use the suppository, left over from the last time, to bring the fever down. But it does become worrying when the fever does not subside after 3 days. Unfortunately most of the clinics are closed due to the Eid holidays so we brought them to the Emergency Room again.
This time its tonsillitis and just like the precious time, my DH seems to be affected as well. Here I am, wife and mother having to look after my babies. Appropriately timed as well as I am unprepared for my trip home in 3 days.
If anything I like to look on the positive side of things. Perhaps them being sick will make good excuse to my friends and relatives back home whom I have not had time to shop gifts for. It also gives me some time to reflect and be grateful for little things in life such as friendship for instance.
I am grateful for the friends I who has become our family. Through them I get the friendship and support I need, who reassured me and gave me pointers and shared their experiences with me. And they continue to do so without expecting anything in return and providing me with understanding and patience. Sometimes I seemed to abandon them, as I was too busy or too absorbed in my own trials and tribulations. Life just sometimes take over and time seemed to fly by and suddenly I realized that I neglected my friends.
Instead of abandoning me, they welcome me back with welcome arms, with warmth and love, whenever I do come back to them. Making me so welcomed, telling me in all sorts of ways that my company was missed. Some even offered me all sort of tips and help when they heard about my situation. And I fell so loved and so grateful that I've been blessed with wonderful friends like these around me.
Dear God, I am grateful that I have been given the opportunity to be a mother and a wife. And I am even more grateful for the wonderful friends you blessed me with. They have kept me sane, gave me all sorts of invaluable advice, not just those near me, but those who are geographically far from me but near to my heart.
My friends, you know who you are and I thank you for sharing with me your wisdom, love and friendship.
For my Little One, I hope you'll get well soon and know that you will be a much stronger person, both physically and mentally after this. Just remember to wash your hands more often and stay away from people who sneeze and cough!
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I'm off to sp0re and Malays/a for 2 weeks. It will be hectic, 6 days with my in laws in KL and 5 days in Sp0re. It will be my first trip, just me and The Little One and I hope God will give me strength to survive the trip.
To my friends in KL, my driver is unable to come this trip so I will be at the mercy of my in laws when it comes to transport. If you guys can come by BB Bangi, I look forward to meeting up with you. I'm in town 16 - 22 Dec, except I may be busy on the 21 due to a cousin's wedding.
To my friends in sp0re, lets try to meet up one morning/evening together with everybody? My itinerary includes trips to Nigh safari, Zoo, Orchard Road, maybe Sentosa, Gyboree and some family obligations. Please also understand that my schedule would also be determined by the health and cooperation of my 3 year old. I'm in town 23 - 27 Dec.
I look forward to meeting up you guys! Wish me luck!
Unfortunately I do not have a local number yet, I plan to buy a new sim card when I arrive. You can text me your number to +966 lima kosong 816 three four 52 by Sunday.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Where did all the time go?
I am grateful that time passes by in a flash these days. It seems that I don't have enough hours in the day to do the things I want to do.
But it seems that I am able to achieve more than when I was staying at home. That, or as my friend KH suggested, I have adapted and managed my time better.
What bothers me a little these days is the changing weather. Woke up with heaviness in my chest this morning. So I tried to slow down so I don't get breatheless. When we stepped out of the house I saw some sort of a dusty fog, not quite a sandstorm, not quite a fog.
And I seem to start sneezing again. I thought I got rid of the cold. Now my Little One has cough and running nose too! Not something a working mummy want (or any mom for that matter.) But now that I am working, I cringe at the idea to have to call in sick and let alone to call in sick on the accord of my Little One being sick. SO I am bumping up my vitamin consumption. I know different studies have stated different things. Some even suggest that its useless to pop those pills. But I am trying my best to boost my immunity so I'll try any thing.
And I do struggle on somedays to keep myself centered. Its easy to get oneself distracted by the passing time and things that people say. But I am adamant to stay positive. Perhaps taking Phillipa's course is paying off.
I seriously believe that negative thinking does nothing but to bring a person down and attracts more negativity in one's life.
I had a conversation with someone who reminded me of the importance for me to keep my positive enthusiasm. I feel for her but at the same time I always believe that the only person we can control is ourselves and we're the only who can make things better for ourselves, no matter what the situation will be. Nothing comes out from slandering other people no matter how bitter you are. Just makes the listener uncomfortable and lose respect for you.
But anyways, that's my lesson for the weekend. I always believe that people are sent in my life for me to learn my lesson so I don't have to repeat them myself.
I know I will have a great week! For those of you waiting for a further update of my Turkey trip, I apologize for not updating, I promise to do so as soon as I have the time :)
PS Thank you Joy for the 12 rules to live by, I so agree with them!
But it seems that I am able to achieve more than when I was staying at home. That, or as my friend KH suggested, I have adapted and managed my time better.
What bothers me a little these days is the changing weather. Woke up with heaviness in my chest this morning. So I tried to slow down so I don't get breatheless. When we stepped out of the house I saw some sort of a dusty fog, not quite a sandstorm, not quite a fog.
And I seem to start sneezing again. I thought I got rid of the cold. Now my Little One has cough and running nose too! Not something a working mummy want (or any mom for that matter.) But now that I am working, I cringe at the idea to have to call in sick and let alone to call in sick on the accord of my Little One being sick. SO I am bumping up my vitamin consumption. I know different studies have stated different things. Some even suggest that its useless to pop those pills. But I am trying my best to boost my immunity so I'll try any thing.
And I do struggle on somedays to keep myself centered. Its easy to get oneself distracted by the passing time and things that people say. But I am adamant to stay positive. Perhaps taking Phillipa's course is paying off.
I seriously believe that negative thinking does nothing but to bring a person down and attracts more negativity in one's life.
I had a conversation with someone who reminded me of the importance for me to keep my positive enthusiasm. I feel for her but at the same time I always believe that the only person we can control is ourselves and we're the only who can make things better for ourselves, no matter what the situation will be. Nothing comes out from slandering other people no matter how bitter you are. Just makes the listener uncomfortable and lose respect for you.
But anyways, that's my lesson for the weekend. I always believe that people are sent in my life for me to learn my lesson so I don't have to repeat them myself.
I know I will have a great week! For those of you waiting for a further update of my Turkey trip, I apologize for not updating, I promise to do so as soon as I have the time :)
PS Thank you Joy for the 12 rules to live by, I so agree with them!
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
She's a preschooler
Perhaps the people around me are just being kind to me. But I believe that if people say it often enough, it will be a prayer and it will come true anyways, so I don't mind.
I have been told by quite a few people that my Little One is the smartest two and half year old they have come across with. She is articulate, she knows exactly what she likes and what she wants and is very observant. She has very good memory and I have learnt my lesson never to tell lies to her and not make any promises unless I fully intent to deliver them.
Of course being her mother, I am naturally biased. I have seen how quickly she takes on to things, how much she loves to be read to and how quickly she learns (especially the stuff I don't want her to pick up. ;))
My challenge as a mother (and I'm sure for other parents too) is to channel her enthusiasm in the direction that could develop her further to maximize her full potential.
And its not even necessarily in term of academic achievement, but rather through socialization and providing her with enriching life experiences that would further widen her mind and her horizon.
Hence I am overjoyed that she is enjoying her new school very much. Just after a mere 2 weeks I see a new sense of independence in her. She declares that "I am a big girl," and does insist on doing a lot of things herself.
Just this morning I had the opportunity to send her to school. We woke her up and asked her if she would like to go to school today and she answered "Yes" with a smile. We asked her if she wanted to use a pull up diaper or just panties and she chose panties, a major step up considering she was still wearing diapers when she started school!
She loves to choose so DH asked her if she wanted a white top or a red top, and if she wants to pair them with trousers or skirt. She quickly made her decision with a smile.
Very reassuring for mum who hasn't been able to send The Little One to school herself.
We got in the van that ferries the children to school and she was happy to sit beside her friend. She started telling me about the basketball hoop that is broken. Smiles all round.
Upon arrival she showed me the way to the front door and promptly reached for the door handle to her clssroom and proceeded to open it herself. Her teacher greeted her with a smile, The Little One hung her hat at the rack, put her water bottle in the designated box and proceeded directly to the table where some colouring sheets have been laid out ready for the children to attempt should that be what they want to do.
I only had time to tell her "Enjoy yourself," and she didn't even look back at me.
I must say that this is an amazing transformation for her. From a child who hung on to me, my jeans and my top refusing to let go, who cried asking for mummy, she has demonstrated to me that she wants to be in the environment, she likes being in the school and looks forward to being there everyday.
And I don't blame her. She is surrounded with a plethora of materials that would interest a child. Just yesterday, she showed me how adept her fingers are at treading some wooden beads through a shoe lace, a new development in her fine motor skills.
And outside there are many different things for a child to further develop their gross motor skills, some tricycles, sand, playhouses, slide, the list seems endless.
All in all, mummy is happy when Little One is happy and Little One is enjoying herself very much so by the looks of things. She even came home with a new song she learned from school and I'm impressed because I thought I knew them all ;)
My dear daughter, I really do hope you enjoy yourself whatever it is in life that you are doing. There is nothing more that I want than for you to be happy.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
May Allah always grant your wishes my child!
"Abah, when will you give me a car present?" said The Little One, sounding hopeful.
"Well it may be a bit expensive to buy you a car," replied DH.
Half an hour later, we went off to our favorite stationary shop. I needed to pick up a few things and wanted to hurry home before the crowd come in.
The Little One wanted to have a long good look at the stickers and I tried to tell her that I bought some already.
The owner of the shop saw her, grunted and gestured for her to follow him and then presented her with a box of 5 matchbox size cars and a couple of cute items.
Little One said "Syukran" and smiled all the way to the car.
Did she know that she was about to get the "car present"? Or did Allah grant my Little One's wishes?
She slept clasping one of the cars last night.
My darling daughter, may Allah always grant you your wishes! Always remember to ask for good things and be grateful for what He bestows us.
Murah betul rezeki mu anakku. Semoga rezekimu sentiasa melimpah ruah sepanjang hayat mu hingga ke anak cucu.
"Well it may be a bit expensive to buy you a car," replied DH.
Half an hour later, we went off to our favorite stationary shop. I needed to pick up a few things and wanted to hurry home before the crowd come in.
The Little One wanted to have a long good look at the stickers and I tried to tell her that I bought some already.
The owner of the shop saw her, grunted and gestured for her to follow him and then presented her with a box of 5 matchbox size cars and a couple of cute items.
Little One said "Syukran" and smiled all the way to the car.
Did she know that she was about to get the "car present"? Or did Allah grant my Little One's wishes?
She slept clasping one of the cars last night.
My darling daughter, may Allah always grant you your wishes! Always remember to ask for good things and be grateful for what He bestows us.
Murah betul rezeki mu anakku. Semoga rezekimu sentiasa melimpah ruah sepanjang hayat mu hingga ke anak cucu.
Friday, September 05, 2008
First weekend in Ramadhan
The evening was filled with relaxed conversation. The men obviously having a good time themselves because their laughter filled the room, so loud that we ladies could hardly hear ourselves speak. The Little One was out with our hosts' teenager daughter. Its lovely that she offered to babysit.
At that point I could not help but be so grateful. Grateful that I have friends who enjoy my company and whose company I enjoy. Who are willing to share the snippets of their lives with me. Who accept me for who I am and I in turn accept them for who they are.
The food on the counter was just overflowing. Laksa lemak (which I love), bubur lumbuk (which I craved), telur ikan goreng (which I havent had for a while), kolak (which i miss), kuih kosue (which i adore and cannot make myself); just to name a few. Alhamdullilah. ALhamdullilah. Alhamdullilah. How blessed can I be?
I had endevoured to make some of MIL's kuih bakar. But my first batch turn out to be pandan chiffon my mistake. So it turns out 1 cup flour, 1 cup sugar and 1 cup eggs + pandan flavouring yields pandan chiffon cake. In my dehydrated stupor I had decided to make the kuih without peeking at the recipe first, only to my dismay found the texture very different until the help pointed out that I had forgotten the coconut milk.
My DH started laughing really loudly and immediately declared that he will call his mum to tell her of my misadventure.
My daughter however was teased by the smell of fresh cake out of the oven requested for a slice. She took two bites and said, "Umi, the cake is very delicious! Thank you for making it for me."
Awww, this one really can really say things to make my heart melt.
So I had to make another batch, almost wiping out the whole tray of eggs I bought. This time I left the help run the show.
In the meantime I decided to make fried popiah from scratch, kari daging and roti jala. Not a good idea when I brought my DD for a nap at 3 pm and I woke up at 4 pm, realizing I lost an hour napping with her when all the other stuff was not done! Thank god for hired helps! So we had a devision of labour. I did the mixing and she did the jala-ing of the roti jala. In the meantime I started with the curry and started rolling the spring rolls and immediately try to fry them.
Of course as we got in the car to leave, I heard the azan call and I rushed back inside again to pick up some cake and dates so we could break our fast and push on.
And we were welcomed with friendly smiles and delicious food.
Conversation after dinner focused on what our holiday plans were. Some will go back to Singapore. Others will stay in Riyadh in anticipation of their ski trip to Chamonix.
I know that I will miss my friends and my friendships most when the time comes for me to leave this city. But that day will be inevitable. In the meantime I am truly grateful for Allah's and their generosity.
So how has your Ramadhan been? I hope your Ramadhan will be as fruitful and joyous as you want it to be.
At that point I could not help but be so grateful. Grateful that I have friends who enjoy my company and whose company I enjoy. Who are willing to share the snippets of their lives with me. Who accept me for who I am and I in turn accept them for who they are.
The food on the counter was just overflowing. Laksa lemak (which I love), bubur lumbuk (which I craved), telur ikan goreng (which I havent had for a while), kolak (which i miss), kuih kosue (which i adore and cannot make myself); just to name a few. Alhamdullilah. ALhamdullilah. Alhamdullilah. How blessed can I be?
I had endevoured to make some of MIL's kuih bakar. But my first batch turn out to be pandan chiffon my mistake. So it turns out 1 cup flour, 1 cup sugar and 1 cup eggs + pandan flavouring yields pandan chiffon cake. In my dehydrated stupor I had decided to make the kuih without peeking at the recipe first, only to my dismay found the texture very different until the help pointed out that I had forgotten the coconut milk.
My DH started laughing really loudly and immediately declared that he will call his mum to tell her of my misadventure.
My daughter however was teased by the smell of fresh cake out of the oven requested for a slice. She took two bites and said, "Umi, the cake is very delicious! Thank you for making it for me."
Awww, this one really can really say things to make my heart melt.
So I had to make another batch, almost wiping out the whole tray of eggs I bought. This time I left the help run the show.
In the meantime I decided to make fried popiah from scratch, kari daging and roti jala. Not a good idea when I brought my DD for a nap at 3 pm and I woke up at 4 pm, realizing I lost an hour napping with her when all the other stuff was not done! Thank god for hired helps! So we had a devision of labour. I did the mixing and she did the jala-ing of the roti jala. In the meantime I started with the curry and started rolling the spring rolls and immediately try to fry them.
Of course as we got in the car to leave, I heard the azan call and I rushed back inside again to pick up some cake and dates so we could break our fast and push on.
And we were welcomed with friendly smiles and delicious food.
Conversation after dinner focused on what our holiday plans were. Some will go back to Singapore. Others will stay in Riyadh in anticipation of their ski trip to Chamonix.
I know that I will miss my friends and my friendships most when the time comes for me to leave this city. But that day will be inevitable. In the meantime I am truly grateful for Allah's and their generosity.
So how has your Ramadhan been? I hope your Ramadhan will be as fruitful and joyous as you want it to be.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Deja vu
I sat in the staff meeting just now and suddenly what was discussed became very familiar. Just hearing the Speaker talk, reminded me that I've heard all this before. Suddenly I had a strong sense of deja vu, that I've been here before.
Then it all came flooding back to me. The memory came from a dream. A dream not too long ago. If anyone had told me then that I will be working today, attending a staff meeting where I was, I would have said, "You got to be kidding me."
On the other hand I believe in Fate and Predestination. It was predestined that the job was for me but in my free will I had turned in down many times with many different excuses, even if many were kind enough to show and point me the way. It took two wonderful friends to put fairy lights on for me, to see the beauty and the opportunity.
How I got hired itself was short of a miracle. Many had come by looking for a job but not getting one. But me, the uncertain old me, now renewed and refreshed from my Power of Positive thinking workshop
went to help a friend and to submit my application form thinking "Surely its safe now to apply because they are no longer hiring." And Lo and behold, I was offered a job the same afternoon.
Even then I was hesitant, thinking that my child may be neglected. But every single step, Allah made it easy for me to accept this opportunity. A friend agrees to babysit. And the Boss agreed to allow my sweet child sit in the toddler's class.
I am truly grateful. Alhamdullilah. Alhamdullilah. Alhamdullilah. I am so grateful for this opportunity, for the support of my wonderful Dh and my wonderful, wonderful friends.
My next challenge is truly excel in what I do and let my light shine through.
Then it all came flooding back to me. The memory came from a dream. A dream not too long ago. If anyone had told me then that I will be working today, attending a staff meeting where I was, I would have said, "You got to be kidding me."
On the other hand I believe in Fate and Predestination. It was predestined that the job was for me but in my free will I had turned in down many times with many different excuses, even if many were kind enough to show and point me the way. It took two wonderful friends to put fairy lights on for me, to see the beauty and the opportunity.
How I got hired itself was short of a miracle. Many had come by looking for a job but not getting one. But me, the uncertain old me, now renewed and refreshed from my Power of Positive thinking workshop
went to help a friend and to submit my application form thinking "Surely its safe now to apply because they are no longer hiring." And Lo and behold, I was offered a job the same afternoon.
Even then I was hesitant, thinking that my child may be neglected. But every single step, Allah made it easy for me to accept this opportunity. A friend agrees to babysit. And the Boss agreed to allow my sweet child sit in the toddler's class.
I am truly grateful. Alhamdullilah. Alhamdullilah. Alhamdullilah. I am so grateful for this opportunity, for the support of my wonderful Dh and my wonderful, wonderful friends.
My next challenge is truly excel in what I do and let my light shine through.
Friday, August 22, 2008
Enthralled
Filled with a strange determination to seize each day with renewed enthusiasm.
Recharged with the power of positive thinking
And surrounded by supportive friends
Spring in each step moving with enthusiasm
The present straddles between the past and the future
Doing the familiar, yet with new twists
A little rusty but improving
I will do it, I can.
I am capable of achieving everything and anything that I want
As long as I yet my mind on it and work really hard
I can only do it through example
As those eyes are constantly watching, taking notes.
My life is full of pleasant surprises.
I did ask for beautiful journeys of abundance
And the present is as bountiful as any
And I am truly grateful. Alhamdullilah
Recharged with the power of positive thinking
And surrounded by supportive friends
Spring in each step moving with enthusiasm
The present straddles between the past and the future
Doing the familiar, yet with new twists
A little rusty but improving
I will do it, I can.
I am capable of achieving everything and anything that I want
As long as I yet my mind on it and work really hard
I can only do it through example
As those eyes are constantly watching, taking notes.
My life is full of pleasant surprises.
I did ask for beautiful journeys of abundance
And the present is as bountiful as any
And I am truly grateful. Alhamdullilah
Saturday, August 02, 2008
Disposable income vs quality of life
It comes to THAT time again when our feet get itchy and restless. Perhaps its because we could not find a way to escape the heat except at the malls that we aspire to be some place else, much greener and cooler.
We have been here four years now after all. Many asked us how we managed to survive here this long. Truth is that I have learned to love my life here. I shall not lie and lament about how it irks me that women cannot drive or that mutt@was could be a nuisance. I am lucky that the means of transportation is available to me. Granted that its not cheap but I really don't see why other people are complaining when the cost of taxis everywhere else in the world has sky rocketed. I remembered stepping in a taxi in Singapore and before I could even tell the taxi driver where we wanted to go, the fare was already close to $10. And that was after waiting 25 minutes in line!
And I've learned to avoid the mutt@wa lairs. I cover up when I am outside and go to areas where I know I will not be harassed. I've had an encounter or two but it has been fairly decent because I've learned how not to attract attention to myself.
I no longer find it strange that we eat in isolation and even draw the curtains at our "booth" at the restaurant and embrace the privacy of eating sans prying eyes.
Perhaps the fact that the above doesn't bother me means that I am accustomed to life here.
AT the same time, I am also accustomed to our purchasing power here. Enjoying 3 teapots of Galler hot chocolate counts as a pleasant treat. (Of course I didn't drink all 3 teapots alone!) My DH now has a bad habit of choosing items of clothing for the Little One without checking out the price tag first. Tsk tsk! A huge no no in our life past!
I remember the looks my in laws gave us when we only drank at Starbucks in KL. I mean buying drinks for 4 adults at Starbucks could be equivalent for a week groceries for some. I still get that bit! I am not out of touch that way. But the way we see it, we live far away from our families and civilization as we know it, so that we can enjoy the little luxuries in life.
I am grateful to Allah that we have it good here. Our accommodation is catered for. With no worry about water or electricity bills. Petrol costs almost next to nothing, (Less than 10 p), much cheaper than bottled water. The pool is just steps away from my back door, the playground 3 minutes away and I can have domestic help to help me with the household chores and babysit if the need arise. I know we have it good.
And not paying taxes is a big plus. I still remember how painful it feels to see half of our hard earned salary siphoned off to subsidize the single mothers and pay off other people's medical bills.
Then again, there is another part of me that wants more. More to life than that of shopping malls and coffee mornings. The ability to upgrade myself, my mind, my horizon.
I want a better education for my child. Where she is taught by trained and passionate people who truly care and inspire. Not just by some people who see the nursery as a money making opportunity. An acquaintance was truly surprised how much the Little One's fees would be for Montessori school next year. Are you ready for the number? Sr15,900 plus SR1,500 non refundable registration fee. Thats USD4,639 or MYR15,132 or SGD6,370. Surely a handsome sum indeed elsewhere too!
I know I have taken as many opportunities possible to better myself. But there are still some areas I would like to pursue to expand my horizon. Early childhood education for a start. Alternative medicine is another.
I want to be able to bring her to wonderful museums with beautiful paintings and/or artifacts that may interest her. To give her a wide range of life experiences, to see all sorts of different things in her own eyes.
I do miss the ability to walk down to the cinema and watch a movie. Or be entertained by a good musical or show. Or simple things like trying the clothes I want to buy before buying them and have the luxury of interacting with a sales woman who may even recommend me some other clothes that may suit me, rather than be served by bored men.
I want to be able to do more things as a family together. Simple things like going to the zoo and amusement parks for instance. I still don't appreciate the value of men or women only days at the zoo. Which is why we don't go unless its a school trip of some sort.
Then again, I suppose, having a bigger disposable income means that we could afford a few foreign holidays in a year.
Perhaps the answer to my own quandary is that its all about compromise. Life is about making compromises. What would I consider as the important aspects in my life that I am willing to forgo other bits of it?
What is my compromise for living here and what else would I have to compromise for us to move and live somewhere I want to live?
Despite my quandary, I am very grateful to Allah for giving us the myriad of experiences he has given us. And yes we are lucky in the sense that we are in a position to choose where we would like to be and where we would like to go. Alhamdullilah.
I am also very grateful that DH is as willing to travel the world and always found the ways and means of doing it.
In that sense Kakteh, I guess I feel that my glass is half full. I always do wish that it's full to the brim that its overflowing but I must always remind myself how lucky I am that it is half full.
And Ghazali, apparently sometimes the decision is made for us by our Almighty ;) Good luck to you, may your family learn to love life here as I do.
We have been here four years now after all. Many asked us how we managed to survive here this long. Truth is that I have learned to love my life here. I shall not lie and lament about how it irks me that women cannot drive or that mutt@was could be a nuisance. I am lucky that the means of transportation is available to me. Granted that its not cheap but I really don't see why other people are complaining when the cost of taxis everywhere else in the world has sky rocketed. I remembered stepping in a taxi in Singapore and before I could even tell the taxi driver where we wanted to go, the fare was already close to $10. And that was after waiting 25 minutes in line!
And I've learned to avoid the mutt@wa lairs. I cover up when I am outside and go to areas where I know I will not be harassed. I've had an encounter or two but it has been fairly decent because I've learned how not to attract attention to myself.
I no longer find it strange that we eat in isolation and even draw the curtains at our "booth" at the restaurant and embrace the privacy of eating sans prying eyes.
Perhaps the fact that the above doesn't bother me means that I am accustomed to life here.
AT the same time, I am also accustomed to our purchasing power here. Enjoying 3 teapots of Galler hot chocolate counts as a pleasant treat. (Of course I didn't drink all 3 teapots alone!) My DH now has a bad habit of choosing items of clothing for the Little One without checking out the price tag first. Tsk tsk! A huge no no in our life past!
I remember the looks my in laws gave us when we only drank at Starbucks in KL. I mean buying drinks for 4 adults at Starbucks could be equivalent for a week groceries for some. I still get that bit! I am not out of touch that way. But the way we see it, we live far away from our families and civilization as we know it, so that we can enjoy the little luxuries in life.
I am grateful to Allah that we have it good here. Our accommodation is catered for. With no worry about water or electricity bills. Petrol costs almost next to nothing, (Less than 10 p), much cheaper than bottled water. The pool is just steps away from my back door, the playground 3 minutes away and I can have domestic help to help me with the household chores and babysit if the need arise. I know we have it good.
And not paying taxes is a big plus. I still remember how painful it feels to see half of our hard earned salary siphoned off to subsidize the single mothers and pay off other people's medical bills.
Then again, there is another part of me that wants more. More to life than that of shopping malls and coffee mornings. The ability to upgrade myself, my mind, my horizon.
I want a better education for my child. Where she is taught by trained and passionate people who truly care and inspire. Not just by some people who see the nursery as a money making opportunity. An acquaintance was truly surprised how much the Little One's fees would be for Montessori school next year. Are you ready for the number? Sr15,900 plus SR1,500 non refundable registration fee. Thats USD4,639 or MYR15,132 or SGD6,370. Surely a handsome sum indeed elsewhere too!
I know I have taken as many opportunities possible to better myself. But there are still some areas I would like to pursue to expand my horizon. Early childhood education for a start. Alternative medicine is another.
I want to be able to bring her to wonderful museums with beautiful paintings and/or artifacts that may interest her. To give her a wide range of life experiences, to see all sorts of different things in her own eyes.
I do miss the ability to walk down to the cinema and watch a movie. Or be entertained by a good musical or show. Or simple things like trying the clothes I want to buy before buying them and have the luxury of interacting with a sales woman who may even recommend me some other clothes that may suit me, rather than be served by bored men.
I want to be able to do more things as a family together. Simple things like going to the zoo and amusement parks for instance. I still don't appreciate the value of men or women only days at the zoo. Which is why we don't go unless its a school trip of some sort.
Then again, I suppose, having a bigger disposable income means that we could afford a few foreign holidays in a year.
Perhaps the answer to my own quandary is that its all about compromise. Life is about making compromises. What would I consider as the important aspects in my life that I am willing to forgo other bits of it?
What is my compromise for living here and what else would I have to compromise for us to move and live somewhere I want to live?
Despite my quandary, I am very grateful to Allah for giving us the myriad of experiences he has given us. And yes we are lucky in the sense that we are in a position to choose where we would like to be and where we would like to go. Alhamdullilah.
I am also very grateful that DH is as willing to travel the world and always found the ways and means of doing it.
In that sense Kakteh, I guess I feel that my glass is half full. I always do wish that it's full to the brim that its overflowing but I must always remind myself how lucky I am that it is half full.
And Ghazali, apparently sometimes the decision is made for us by our Almighty ;) Good luck to you, may your family learn to love life here as I do.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Facing my cobwebs
The last two days was a bit of a struggle. The weather didn't help either. It was freezing cold, grey and wet. All the same reasons why I loved the city. With so little time and so much to do, we had to have lists written down, people to call, cheques to write out, appointments to arrange, keys to be handed over.
Making decisions was sometimes hard. Should we let go? With whom?
Meanwhile Danny the Decorator was making good progress with the painting of the apartment. Another decision we had to make but didn't anticipate. He didn't come cheap. Nothing did. But what do you do?
At first we were really depressed. The place we so loved was such in a dissaray. Unloved and not taken care of. It was a place built with love, hope and sweat.
Perhaps we loved the apartment so much precisely because we had to work extra hard to earn it. To save up for the deposit we had to put ourselves on a strict budget. Every penny had to be accounted for. I'm sure we still have the spreadsheet on a memory disk somewhere. How every penny spent is noted down and the budget adjusted accordingly.
On the days I bought the travel card which then cost GBP4.50, I would have to make sure that I will utilize it as much as I could. It could be the day I go to the market in Croydon, or my bus ride to buy meat, then for Italian class and even a trip to Tesco before heading home. We would both bring large rucksacks so we could stuff all the groceries and necessities in them. We could only buy what we could carry and each purchase would have to be considered seriously, is this a need or want? Its quite hard to struggle with groceries on the bus, you see.
I would normally buy whatever was reduced or on offer. Thats the only way to make the money go further. He would bring a packed lunch. And if we ate out, we would choose things that would last the longest, make us most full for the minimal spend.
Those days I often asked myself, what did I get myself into. We moved to the UK, into a life of penny pinching and public transport from a life of being chauffeured driven and eating out at top eateries in Jakarta. As I struggled with the weight on my back, I would remember the days when groceries were sent to the car and from the car to the apartment by the doorman. But it was a life we chose to leave behind. All for a greener dream.
As uncle Dean pointed out when we told him the story, sometimes its good to struggle a little in life. Makes you appreciate what you have better.
And he is right of course.
Which was why it was so hard to move out of the house. We moved out of the country 4 years ago but just could not move out of that flat.
I still remember how 6 years ago, we slept on the floor on a comforter on the first night we moved in with the patio door open. We had no furniture. But we were incredibly happy. We spent hours trawling about furniture stores, DIY shops, looking at what we want and deciding what we could afford. Once again, the trusted Excel spreadsheet was drawn up, how much we would spend on what and how we would get it home and how else we could get it cheaper.
We painted each walls ourselves. Still have the rollers and the paint tray in the store room. Each of that we did with joy and anticipation. Each choice we did together after hours or research and contemplation.
Which explained why we began to feel a bit different as Danny painted each room. He first started in the kitchen. The room that broke my heart when I got home. It just looked so tired and uncared for. I had spent many hours in that space, cleaning, cooking, thinking. The fresh coat of paint just lifted the spirits of that room. A new lease of life. A breathe of fresh air.
Danny also repaired the hole in the ceiling. Another item that we just kept at the back of our minds for a long time. Why we didn't get it repaired right away I don't know. Perhaps I was afraid of the damage it would cost.
And it was amazing how much stuff we still had there. The skip we hired got quite full. The old TVs got in there first. The TV was purchased within the first 2 months on our arrival. Luckily Curry's delivers.
Clothes, books, shoes were either sent to the charity shop or clothes bank. I still could not throw out or give away the Ecco shoes I backpacked in Europe with. My first Coach bag that was bought in Hong Kong was still in that cupboard. Good thing I checked the pockets before sending it off because it still had some money in it. For the longest time, I could not part with the bag because it was the first good bag I owned that DH got me when we were living in Hong Kong. But it was not something I would use anymore. SO I had to set it free to someone who could use it and give it a good home.
I had to smile when I saw that black rug sack sitting pretty in the window of Oxfam charity shop. Goodbye my dear. May someone else find you a great joy.
Lesson No 362, my memories stay with me, not with worldly personal possessions. If anything, the world is open for me to make even more beautiful memories.
Towards the end, I had to enlist the help of uncle Dean to get rid of the rest of our stuff. And boy we had so much stuff! Luckily he is a very keen gardener and was very keen indeed in inheriting all of our garden tools. We had everything, the hedge trimmer, the landmower, the compost, miracle grow, the nice hose, the extension cord. Everything he took.
He helped me emptied out the cupboard. Oh boy I bought a lot of candles. I don't know why I bought them when I hardly used them. Perhaps I thought I'd use them for a romantic dinner and/or cuddle or something.
Lesson no 363, no more buying candles! Unless I could use them to see my auras or something useful to that effect.
With Danny's progress each room was painted with magnolia walls and brilliant white ceilings. He did a good job and the apartment got a new suit, a new skin, a new feel. Each room became depersonalized, they were no longer the walls we painted with love and became a sign of old baggage being getting rid off.
I just had to close my eyes. What could fit in our bags could come with us, the rest well either went to Danny, uncle Dean, Kak Nor, the charity shop, the rubbish bin and/or the skip. Its almost like having my own Life Laundry episode.
Lesson no 364, need to trim down my clutter. I tend to accumulate too much. What is no longer used need to be recycled or gotten rid of.
If anything our struggle is nothing different that what most people have to go through each day. It is no way extraordinary. If anything it made us stronger and more aware of what we are capable of achieving as long as we set our minds to it and work hard at it.
So everyone kept asking me how my trip to London was. To that my answer is, I had to face my past and our future at the same time. Of course we had some sunny days and went to a few interesting places that perhaps I will blog about. But at this time, I am facing my demons. I have come to face the fact that I am a hoarder and I must stop hoarding.
And I will set the flat free, so that my tenant will live there and get the joy and happiness that we enjoyed, helping us save for The Little One's future. There are no more cobwebs of my inability to let go. I have moved on. And I will continue to move on.
From now on, I will make better choices. I will shift my life from shades of gray to beautiful living colors.
My beautiful child, I hope you will understand that good things in life don't just come in a platter to you. May you learn from our life lessons, not repeat them and achieve better than what we can. May you lead a life more extraordinary than ours, with each day bringing wondrous joy.
My darling dearest, we did this together before and will go through it together again if we need to. Thank you for traveling round the world with me. I love you and want you to always be happy.
Making decisions was sometimes hard. Should we let go? With whom?
Meanwhile Danny the Decorator was making good progress with the painting of the apartment. Another decision we had to make but didn't anticipate. He didn't come cheap. Nothing did. But what do you do?
At first we were really depressed. The place we so loved was such in a dissaray. Unloved and not taken care of. It was a place built with love, hope and sweat.
Perhaps we loved the apartment so much precisely because we had to work extra hard to earn it. To save up for the deposit we had to put ourselves on a strict budget. Every penny had to be accounted for. I'm sure we still have the spreadsheet on a memory disk somewhere. How every penny spent is noted down and the budget adjusted accordingly.
On the days I bought the travel card which then cost GBP4.50, I would have to make sure that I will utilize it as much as I could. It could be the day I go to the market in Croydon, or my bus ride to buy meat, then for Italian class and even a trip to Tesco before heading home. We would both bring large rucksacks so we could stuff all the groceries and necessities in them. We could only buy what we could carry and each purchase would have to be considered seriously, is this a need or want? Its quite hard to struggle with groceries on the bus, you see.
I would normally buy whatever was reduced or on offer. Thats the only way to make the money go further. He would bring a packed lunch. And if we ate out, we would choose things that would last the longest, make us most full for the minimal spend.
Those days I often asked myself, what did I get myself into. We moved to the UK, into a life of penny pinching and public transport from a life of being chauffeured driven and eating out at top eateries in Jakarta. As I struggled with the weight on my back, I would remember the days when groceries were sent to the car and from the car to the apartment by the doorman. But it was a life we chose to leave behind. All for a greener dream.
As uncle Dean pointed out when we told him the story, sometimes its good to struggle a little in life. Makes you appreciate what you have better.
And he is right of course.
Which was why it was so hard to move out of the house. We moved out of the country 4 years ago but just could not move out of that flat.
I still remember how 6 years ago, we slept on the floor on a comforter on the first night we moved in with the patio door open. We had no furniture. But we were incredibly happy. We spent hours trawling about furniture stores, DIY shops, looking at what we want and deciding what we could afford. Once again, the trusted Excel spreadsheet was drawn up, how much we would spend on what and how we would get it home and how else we could get it cheaper.
We painted each walls ourselves. Still have the rollers and the paint tray in the store room. Each of that we did with joy and anticipation. Each choice we did together after hours or research and contemplation.
Which explained why we began to feel a bit different as Danny painted each room. He first started in the kitchen. The room that broke my heart when I got home. It just looked so tired and uncared for. I had spent many hours in that space, cleaning, cooking, thinking. The fresh coat of paint just lifted the spirits of that room. A new lease of life. A breathe of fresh air.
Danny also repaired the hole in the ceiling. Another item that we just kept at the back of our minds for a long time. Why we didn't get it repaired right away I don't know. Perhaps I was afraid of the damage it would cost.And it was amazing how much stuff we still had there. The skip we hired got quite full. The old TVs got in there first. The TV was purchased within the first 2 months on our arrival. Luckily Curry's delivers.
Clothes, books, shoes were either sent to the charity shop or clothes bank. I still could not throw out or give away the Ecco shoes I backpacked in Europe with. My first Coach bag that was bought in Hong Kong was still in that cupboard. Good thing I checked the pockets before sending it off because it still had some money in it. For the longest time, I could not part with the bag because it was the first good bag I owned that DH got me when we were living in Hong Kong. But it was not something I would use anymore. SO I had to set it free to someone who could use it and give it a good home.
I had to smile when I saw that black rug sack sitting pretty in the window of Oxfam charity shop. Goodbye my dear. May someone else find you a great joy.
Lesson No 362, my memories stay with me, not with worldly personal possessions. If anything, the world is open for me to make even more beautiful memories.
Towards the end, I had to enlist the help of uncle Dean to get rid of the rest of our stuff. And boy we had so much stuff! Luckily he is a very keen gardener and was very keen indeed in inheriting all of our garden tools. We had everything, the hedge trimmer, the landmower, the compost, miracle grow, the nice hose, the extension cord. Everything he took.
He helped me emptied out the cupboard. Oh boy I bought a lot of candles. I don't know why I bought them when I hardly used them. Perhaps I thought I'd use them for a romantic dinner and/or cuddle or something.
Lesson no 363, no more buying candles! Unless I could use them to see my auras or something useful to that effect.
With Danny's progress each room was painted with magnolia walls and brilliant white ceilings. He did a good job and the apartment got a new suit, a new skin, a new feel. Each room became depersonalized, they were no longer the walls we painted with love and became a sign of old baggage being getting rid off.
I just had to close my eyes. What could fit in our bags could come with us, the rest well either went to Danny, uncle Dean, Kak Nor, the charity shop, the rubbish bin and/or the skip. Its almost like having my own Life Laundry episode.
Lesson no 364, need to trim down my clutter. I tend to accumulate too much. What is no longer used need to be recycled or gotten rid of.
If anything our struggle is nothing different that what most people have to go through each day. It is no way extraordinary. If anything it made us stronger and more aware of what we are capable of achieving as long as we set our minds to it and work hard at it.
So everyone kept asking me how my trip to London was. To that my answer is, I had to face my past and our future at the same time. Of course we had some sunny days and went to a few interesting places that perhaps I will blog about. But at this time, I am facing my demons. I have come to face the fact that I am a hoarder and I must stop hoarding.
And I will set the flat free, so that my tenant will live there and get the joy and happiness that we enjoyed, helping us save for The Little One's future. There are no more cobwebs of my inability to let go. I have moved on. And I will continue to move on.From now on, I will make better choices. I will shift my life from shades of gray to beautiful living colors.
My beautiful child, I hope you will understand that good things in life don't just come in a platter to you. May you learn from our life lessons, not repeat them and achieve better than what we can. May you lead a life more extraordinary than ours, with each day bringing wondrous joy.
My darling dearest, we did this together before and will go through it together again if we need to. Thank you for traveling round the world with me. I love you and want you to always be happy.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Sometimes people are sent to you for a reason
Su K is one of those people that would make some people uncomfortable. She is non conforming. She doesn't really care how she looks or what she wears and sometimes does say things that may throw people off.
And she hates TV. Which does kill off some conversations. Some people find her downright strange, others find her intimidating.
But I am beginning to find Su K to be a friend and a teacher. Her unconventional ways may not necessarily be my life style of choice but I do find that there is a lot I could learn from her. (Like premaculture which could be a whole different entry.)
I remember her coming to a quilt meeting and for some reason or other her driver didn't show up. I didn't want to leave her and her neighbor behind but could not offer to send them home because they live way on the other side of town and I wanted to get home before the Little One's bed time.
So Su K said, "Its ok just drop me off outside somewhere and we'll hail a taxi."
Now thats a big thing here. 2 women, one of them a white Amer/c@n, hailing a taxi by the side of the road of an unknown neighborhood. I was very concerned for them. But Su K was not frazzled. She took it in her stride.
I happened to hangout with her the other day and she told me a story about Bill.
Bill was someone she picked up on her way home from her University. There were very few houses in her neighborhood and to see a man walking while trying to hitchhike was something quite rare . SO Su K stopped and told him, "If you are not dangerous you can come in my car and I'll take you to where you want to go."
Su K was brave that way.
So Bill told her that he had come from Illinois and was in Kansas because he heard that his uncle was building a log house and needed help. He had hitchedhiked part of the way, walked the other parts and slept in the rough, under bridges and so on.
Bill's uncle's house was about 30 mins away from Su K's house and she drove him there, only to find, upon their arrival that 2 M3xicans were moving into the house that Bill thought belonged to his uncle. They did not know about Bill's uncle and no one around there could give him any information about his uncle.
So Su K decided to bring Bill home.
She told him that he is welcomes to stay in their farm There is a lot of work to be done and they would provide him with room and board in return.
As it turned out that at that time Su K's husband wanted to run a bed & breakfast business. They had a huge basement which was in a huge mess and needed to be tidied up.
Bill stayed. And it turned out that they needed to retile that basement and guess what? Bill was a professional tiler.
So Bill tiled that floor. Help them fix up the basement. When he finished Su K and her hubby paid Bill and bought him a bus ticket to get home.
She has never heard from Bill since of course.
I don't know if I will take my chances with people the same way Su K does, but Su K's story reminds me how sometimes it pays to listen to our instincts.
My fear of getting hurt make me stay away from people. But Su K's story just reminded me that I don't always need to be afraid of helping people who may need my help because I may need their help instead!
And she hates TV. Which does kill off some conversations. Some people find her downright strange, others find her intimidating.
But I am beginning to find Su K to be a friend and a teacher. Her unconventional ways may not necessarily be my life style of choice but I do find that there is a lot I could learn from her. (Like premaculture which could be a whole different entry.)
I remember her coming to a quilt meeting and for some reason or other her driver didn't show up. I didn't want to leave her and her neighbor behind but could not offer to send them home because they live way on the other side of town and I wanted to get home before the Little One's bed time.
So Su K said, "Its ok just drop me off outside somewhere and we'll hail a taxi."
Now thats a big thing here. 2 women, one of them a white Amer/c@n, hailing a taxi by the side of the road of an unknown neighborhood. I was very concerned for them. But Su K was not frazzled. She took it in her stride.
I happened to hangout with her the other day and she told me a story about Bill.
Bill was someone she picked up on her way home from her University. There were very few houses in her neighborhood and to see a man walking while trying to hitchhike was something quite rare . SO Su K stopped and told him, "If you are not dangerous you can come in my car and I'll take you to where you want to go."
Su K was brave that way.
So Bill told her that he had come from Illinois and was in Kansas because he heard that his uncle was building a log house and needed help. He had hitchedhiked part of the way, walked the other parts and slept in the rough, under bridges and so on.
Bill's uncle's house was about 30 mins away from Su K's house and she drove him there, only to find, upon their arrival that 2 M3xicans were moving into the house that Bill thought belonged to his uncle. They did not know about Bill's uncle and no one around there could give him any information about his uncle.
So Su K decided to bring Bill home.
She told him that he is welcomes to stay in their farm There is a lot of work to be done and they would provide him with room and board in return.
As it turned out that at that time Su K's husband wanted to run a bed & breakfast business. They had a huge basement which was in a huge mess and needed to be tidied up.
Bill stayed. And it turned out that they needed to retile that basement and guess what? Bill was a professional tiler.
So Bill tiled that floor. Help them fix up the basement. When he finished Su K and her hubby paid Bill and bought him a bus ticket to get home.
She has never heard from Bill since of course.
I don't know if I will take my chances with people the same way Su K does, but Su K's story reminds me how sometimes it pays to listen to our instincts.
My fear of getting hurt make me stay away from people. But Su K's story just reminded me that I don't always need to be afraid of helping people who may need my help because I may need their help instead!
Monday, June 09, 2008
The girl with the (faux) pearl necklace
She's come a long way. From hating separation and school, she now readily goes to school. Its not that I want her educated in terms of reading and writing sort of way. I wanted to give her the opportunity to interact with other children without clinging on to me. I didn't want her to have the only child syndrome, spoilt and do not know how to interact with other children their age who behave inappropriately with other people.
Its wonderful to see that she is well liked by her peers. I mean of course I know my child is charismatic and agreeable. But to see her exuding leadership qualities at a young age is just something else. I guess she could just be bossy but amazing still is that other children want to be with her. They want to do what she is doing and greet her with such enthusiasm and joy. To have friends who like you at such an early age is surely a wonderful thing.
Last week they had a "graduation" day. The Little One of course decided that it was her most disagreeable day. Luckily enough we managed to muster this photograph. I was in two minds about the picture. On one hand I wanted her to look exactly as she does normally, a little bit mucky and a little bit cheeky. At the same time I wanted to dress her up in one of the beautiful frocks gathering in her closet. At least we'll remember that she had smocking dresses.
There is a story to the pearls she wore. It was given as a souvenir from a friend on our roadtrip to Madinah. I had wanted to buy the faux pearls because they were sold by Chinese looking young girls just outside the Majid with two qiblat. Unfortunately I didn't have small change then and another lady bought them as a gift for me. It just touched me that girls at such a young age are selling stuff perhaps as ways to help bring food in for their family. Its much better than begging I guess.
And it was My Little One who requested to wear these pearls I almost forgot and kept away in a drawer.
I almost think that The Little One knows that the pearls serve as a reminder to me how fortunate we are and how grateful I am to my Creator for all he has given to us.
My Little One I hope that you will always lead a life full of happiness and privilege. I know you will understand that it is through prayer, concentrated intent and hard work that you can achieve all that you want in your life.
Its wonderful to see that she is well liked by her peers. I mean of course I know my child is charismatic and agreeable. But to see her exuding leadership qualities at a young age is just something else. I guess she could just be bossy but amazing still is that other children want to be with her. They want to do what she is doing and greet her with such enthusiasm and joy. To have friends who like you at such an early age is surely a wonderful thing.
Last week they had a "graduation" day. The Little One of course decided that it was her most disagreeable day. Luckily enough we managed to muster this photograph. I was in two minds about the picture. On one hand I wanted her to look exactly as she does normally, a little bit mucky and a little bit cheeky. At the same time I wanted to dress her up in one of the beautiful frocks gathering in her closet. At least we'll remember that she had smocking dresses.
There is a story to the pearls she wore. It was given as a souvenir from a friend on our roadtrip to Madinah. I had wanted to buy the faux pearls because they were sold by Chinese looking young girls just outside the Majid with two qiblat. Unfortunately I didn't have small change then and another lady bought them as a gift for me. It just touched me that girls at such a young age are selling stuff perhaps as ways to help bring food in for their family. Its much better than begging I guess.
And it was My Little One who requested to wear these pearls I almost forgot and kept away in a drawer.
I almost think that The Little One knows that the pearls serve as a reminder to me how fortunate we are and how grateful I am to my Creator for all he has given to us.
My Little One I hope that you will always lead a life full of happiness and privilege. I know you will understand that it is through prayer, concentrated intent and hard work that you can achieve all that you want in your life.
Friday, June 06, 2008
Oppurtunity of a lifetime?
About twelve years ago, we were shopping for our wedding and engagement rings and some pink diamonds were presented to us.
I was young and naive and did not do my research. Back then the Internet was not as extensive as it is now.
Not knowing what pink diamonds were, I turned down that opportunity to pick them as my wedding ring.
I love the ring that we chose. But at the back of my mind I will always remember that instance as the ignorance of my youth and my lack of knowledge. It was an opportunity that presented itself to us, out of the blue, but I didn't take it up because I didn't know any better.
If anything it was a lesson that I kept. That I will not stop my quest for knowledge and to learn more about the things and the world around me such that if I stumble a treasure by chance again, I will grab that opportunity and not let it go.
It appears that on the 10th year of our marriage, (I still can't believe that its been that long) another opportunity of a lifetime approaches us.
I can still remember that instance when I saw the pink diamonds, it was "Oh really? Ok. Whatever."
Now these treasures are presented to me, with the possibility of me owning them. My initial thought is that we don't know enough. And even with the internet I don't seem to know enough.
Their owner is selling them because she wants to put her child through University.
And me? I am still undecided. But I am very grateful the opportunity is presented to us.
I was young and naive and did not do my research. Back then the Internet was not as extensive as it is now.
Not knowing what pink diamonds were, I turned down that opportunity to pick them as my wedding ring.
I love the ring that we chose. But at the back of my mind I will always remember that instance as the ignorance of my youth and my lack of knowledge. It was an opportunity that presented itself to us, out of the blue, but I didn't take it up because I didn't know any better.
If anything it was a lesson that I kept. That I will not stop my quest for knowledge and to learn more about the things and the world around me such that if I stumble a treasure by chance again, I will grab that opportunity and not let it go.
It appears that on the 10th year of our marriage, (I still can't believe that its been that long) another opportunity of a lifetime approaches us.
I can still remember that instance when I saw the pink diamonds, it was "Oh really? Ok. Whatever."
Now these treasures are presented to me, with the possibility of me owning them. My initial thought is that we don't know enough. And even with the internet I don't seem to know enough.
Their owner is selling them because she wants to put her child through University.
And me? I am still undecided. But I am very grateful the opportunity is presented to us.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)