Monday, February 21, 2005

Bite that tongue

I am somewhat disappointed in myself. Just not too long ago, I had resolved that whatever I say, it must be about good things. But I don't know what overcome me over the weekend, perhaps it was boredom. Perhaps the cold wind froze my brains out. (I know its a lame excuse.) But I managed to betray my promise to myself.

Reminder to self, learn to keep my mouth shut. Bite my tongue when I feel the urge to blurt out a piece of gossip. Take deep breaths, exhale.

I know this, but sometimes I do forget, and words are blurted out before I can think of the consequences of me saying something. And before I know it, its too late.

Its out there in the open. And then it comes back to me.

Sometimes people tell me things. Frankly, I'd rather they didn't because I do not want to burden myself with talk about other people. But sometimes (the devil in me) do like it that I get to hear these stories. Especially the juicy nasty bits.

And I don't know why I do it, I sometimes share it with someone else, with no malice or ill thought. I am naive to think that everyone thinks like me. Shame on me!

At the end of the day, everyone has their own agenda. And I should assume the worst. That perhaps they are collecting that information and then use it as ammunition against others.

When it comes back to me, full circle, I realised that it was possibly my fault. I should have kept my mouth shut, bite my tongue and be quiet.

Its amazing how fast that news circulate too! Just last weekend, I just casually mentioned it to A. I told her, in the strictest confidence of course that, something happened between T and M.

I was silly to think that A will keep it to herself!

And four days later, T mentioned to me that R mentioned to her that A knew about what happened to T and M.

R said, "T, I don't know how but A knows about you and M."

ERKKK! I hope my shock and horror did not show on my face!

I didn't even know that A and T didn't have a good relationship! What have I done?

Realizing that this cannot be undone I have resolved that from now on I will keep my mouth shut!

You see, sometimes the mouth has a mind of its own and blurts out something which the mind knows it shouldn't. Well if that happens again, I shall bite my tongue. Hard!

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